Updated: Nov 16
It's the simple things.. deep conversation under the stars, comfortable silence, an unspoken understanding , compassion, communication in the hard times & mutual respect. Simple yet the simplest things can be the most challenging to accomplish.
Everyone's love language is different. Understanding what that is before you engage in a partnership is a huge lesson.
5 love languages is a simple book but definitely one I would recommend to understand what your expectations are and how your partner/children /friends perceive love.
I wish I had access to this info a long time ago . But we are all learning as we go.
Everyone has a different love Language ✨
Cliff notes for curious minds but maybe no access or time to read the book .
The basics of it are:
1. Communication...that is kind, positive affirming words, the spoken poetry of gentle compassionate communication
2. Physical...that can be through touch ( I'm not talking just sex) it's more intimate than that
3. Action... acts of service..Doing little thoughtful things.. making someone's favorite meal , helpful things to take the stress off your partner
4. Little offerings or gifts .. these are physical gifts . This is a double edged sword .
They can be grand or simple. Like a little note . The point of them is they come from the heart . With no strings attached.
Gifts that don't come from the heart and from a place of emotional manipulation or control are not true gifts. And those can become a source of contention . Like a daily reminder of the lack of care for some people.
5. Time .. quality time given . This is not always quantity. Taking the time when you see your partner really needs that connection. Over your needs in that moment .
This creates emotional connection that builds a solid foundation for a stronger bond in a healthy relationship .
If these aren't received or reciprocated that's when we become resentful and start to pull back . It's the beginning of the end of any relationship as it's now no longer a give and take of equal energies (not the same energy exchanges always ,just balanced in their own way )
Then the relationship emotion tug of war starts . And things snowball from there .
Knowing these Simple steps I feel can help us in partnerships, family , business ect ...
We can't be fully present to receive until we have done healing work on ourselves though. Because we will be in a trauma state, being reactive and deflecting our pain , rather than receptive to others acts of love/ care /compassion.
That is why healing and shadow work is so important before we get into new relationships ✨